Over A Year

It’s crazy to think over a year ago was the last time I felt the mental space to sit down and write a blog. You’d think I’d need more room to let my thoughts out with the complexity of what my brain has gone through the last year, yet I often found myself so mentally taxed the idea of writing seemed unimaginable. That’s one unique aspect of writing I don’t believe translates to a lot of hobbies. As much as I love making stories and writing, it’s also takes a lot of opposite focus.

Opposite focus, I made that one up myself. I define it as when you need to be able to let go of things so your brain can roam free in the land of imagination. You’re focusing on something, yes, but it’s the ability to let go of the day so your mind can wander. That makes it really hard to write when the events of the day are necessary to make you better at your job. I spent many a night contemplating an event and how I could have done a better job. I had no room to let that disappear and drift into an imaginary world of writing.

Now I know that immediately leads one to think, why not blog? Wouldn’t allow that be more productive if written out in some sort of blog? The answer to that is yes. I spent some time in a little journal to go through my day, but I couldn’t honestly write out the neuonses of Air Traffic Control in a blog without getting bogged down by what people were reading and questioning of they’d understand.

The fact of the matter is, as much as a blog is for yourself, you know others will see it. You can wear your heart on your sleeve, but a tiny bit of you will always be aware this is not just for you. For me, that’s what makes it mean something. I’ve written in many journals, but they never held the same weight as writing out in a blog, knowing someone would read it.

With that all summed up nicely or not, I rambled for this one, I’m hoping I’m finally back to a headspace where I can once again write my blog and start working on my book again. It’s been a long while since I felt truly able to do it.